Thursday, January 21, 2016

Well meaning, unsolicited, misguided, horrible, awful advice



    Friends. Friends are great. I love my friends. I hate to brag, but I have absolutely amazing friends. They are supportive, understanding, generous; all of the qualities that you would want in your friends. I have never hesitated to share my struggles with them and I have never regretted doing so... Until I started trying to have a baby. Now, let me preface this by saying that I do not mean to offend anyone with what I'm about to say. Please, if you recognize your own advice in the following paragraphs do not A.) think that I am in any way angry or upset with you, or B.) feel the need to apologize to me. It is completely unnecessary. I adore you. Always have, always will. Every piece of advice discussed in the following post was given to me by multiple people, so please do not feel singled out. I know that all of my friend's hearts were in the right place; their advice however, was not. It is important to me that everyone who is still out there, struggling everyday with the pain of infertility knows that they are not withstanding the unintentionally hurtful advice of friends and family alone. For the most part, this advice is doled out by people who tried for like, a minute to get pregnant, or got pregnant while actively trying not to do so. They have no clue what it's like to want a baby more than anything on Earth or the devastation of failing at this goal month after month after month.

    I'll start with the crown jewel of crappy advice. “You're thinking about it too much, just relax and stop thinking about it and it will happen.” “Stop trying so hard.” Feel free to insert any variation of this garbage advice that you like. I believe this is the absolute most irritating and misguided thing that people say to someone trying to have a baby. Not only is it a total blow off answer, but it is also annoyingly inaccurate and places the blame on the poor woman trying to conceive. It's my fault now because I'm thinking about it and wanting it too much. As soon as someone spouts this piece of wisdom at me I immediately know two things. One, they have never struggled to have a baby and have no clue how impossible it is to turn off the thoughts and emotions that accompany this wish. And two, that they know very little about how reproduction actually works.

    Getting pregnant, even when attempted between two healthy adults whose reproductive systems are working perfectly is still a timing game. An egg only lives twelve to twenty four hours following ovulation. Sperm can live from two to five or five to seven days in a female's body after intercourse (depending on who you ask. Over two and a half years, I've asked everyone.) These little swimmers need time to swim up to where the egg is, however so sex at the time of ovulation is often too late to result in a pregnancy. (I know more about sperm than I ever dreamed or wanted to.) I learned that male sperm swim faster but die sooner and female sperm swim slower but live longer so if you ovulate right after intercourse your chances are higher of having a boy. If you ovulate a few days after intercourse your chances are higher of having a girl. But I digress...

    The point is, relaxing and not paying attention to timing is horrible advice. If there is an issue, relaxing will rarely fix it. Women who deal with miscarriages and a lack of ovulation will not find that relaxing solves these problems. Relaxing will not fix a luteal phase defect, an issue with implantation, a low sperm count or a lack of cervical fluid. It could, however give a little problem the time it needs to grow and become a big problem. This is the worst advice ever and should never be given to anyone at any time, ever.

    “Have sex every day all month long.” (This gem almost led to me getting divorced, not knocked up.) What's less sexy than baby making sex after 2 years? Feeling pressured to have it every freaking day sex. Even if you are successful at doing this, you are wasting your time anyway because a man can't even make sperm that fast so really, after the first time you were just having fun sex and who the hell wants that?! Save that crap for after you're pregnant. These are working sperm not leisure sperm. Not to mention, as I stated before, conception is a timing game. You can have sex ten million times a day and if it's not at the right time of your cycle you have exactly zero percent chance that it will result in a big fat positive on a pregnancy test.

    I had multiple friend's tell me after two and a half years of trying that I “really haven't been trying all that long.” Ummmm. Okay. Taking your temperature every single day and feeling completely crushed every single month for 30 consecutive months in a row seemed long to me, but I guess it just flew by for them. Not to mention, that for a woman my age the medical community recommends testing after 6 months of trying without success. So yes, I actually was trying for a very long time even by medical standards.

    I've been told by more than one friend immediately after opening up about my struggle, that they just had or were currently having a pregnancy scare of their own and how much they hoped they were not pregnant. During my time trying to conceive, I frequently found myself just looking at people, wondering why I ever opened my stupid mouth. And more so, why they ever opened theirs. I rarely felt better after telling anyone about what I was going through.

    Fortunately, there were a few exceptions to this statement and I credit these people with allowing me to retain the small portion of sanity that I did. One was my mother, who has an uncanny knack for always making me feel better. I guess it's just a mom thing. The other is the one friend who got it. Her's is a story for another day however. The short version is that she didn't offer me any advice. She encouraged me, she validated my pain and she gave me hope. Friends who were currently also trying to get pregnant and friends who had suffered with infertility themselves always knew what I needed. They never tried to fix my feelings. They just validated them and that is what I needed.

    Often, I think people just wanted to make me feel better. They didn't like seeing me sad and the knee-jerk reaction is to try to fix it. But there is no fixing this. My feelings were valid and while I know that everything happens at the time that it is meant to, that is not comforting at all to hear in the midst of a breakdown. Nor is hearing that God will give me children when he feels it is time. Why was it time for the drug addict I saw that morning to have her fourth baby in God's eyes? Regardless of your beliefs, this conversation is not the time for that logic.

    Bad, unwanted advice is one of the parts of trying to conceive that is the most frustrating and difficult to navigate. God love them, your family and friends love you and that is what is important to remember. My advice to you if a friend of yours confides in you that she is having trouble trying to conceive is to just keep your freaking mouth shut. Especially if you didn't have any trouble starting your own family. Just listen. Struggling with infertility is an incredibly isolating experience. You find yourself not wanting to share your situation with anyone around you.

    I found that when I did share what I was going through with friends, they would either offer advice that was irritating to me or misguided, or they would just blow me off. “It will happen when it's supposed to,” and move on to their own latest crisis. I also found that after telling friends, they would treat me with pity when they talked to me about other women in our circle getting pregnant. This had a tendency to make it much more difficult for me to be excited for my friends when they announced their subsequent pregnancies.

    I also found that I didn't want to tell the people who were the absolute closest to me, my family. I had, well have a nephew who I absolutely adore. I loved him (and still do) to the moon and back and I was afraid that if my family knew just how hard I was struggling they would feel weird about telling me when they became pregnant and I just couldn't bear that. At that time in my life my nephew was one of the brightest spots in my world. I couldn't stand thinking that if my sister became pregnant again (which she eventually did) that it could be “an issue” of some kind for her to tell me. That would have broken my heart into tiny little pieces.

    Anyone who is even a little bit close to me knows how I feel about my nephew. That little boy has had his aunt Sissy wrapped tightly around his little finger since day one, and I adore it. Unfortunately, the relationship that I have with him also became the topic of another stupid thing that people would frequently say to me during this time. “When are you guys having kids?” they would ask. “Well, we are trying. Have been for a while it just isn't happening as quickly as we would like” I would reply, heart in my throat and tears just behind my eyes. “Well, at least you have your nephew.” And off they would go. Leaving me standing there, dumfounded. Let me assure you, that I would absolutely take a bullet for my nephew. To say that I adore him cheapens how I actually feel about him. But a nephew is in absolutely no way like having a child of your own. It is unequivocally not the same thing, and should not ever be compared. A nephew does not a son make, even when he is as cute as a button and the light of your life, as mine is.

    I am tackling this uncomfortable topic for two purposes, neither of which is to make anyone feel badly. First, I hope to remind the people currently dealing with infertility that they are not alone and to hopefully give them a chuckle. I want to explain why so many people suffer in silence with infertility and don't feel comfortable opening up to even their closest friends. And secondly, I want to let anyone in the position of giving advice to just stop. No advice is wanted, warranted or necessary. I promise you, your friend has been fixating on this subject for much longer than you realize and you are not going to give them any new information. Instead, just listen. Validate their pain and how difficult this time in their lives must be for them. Tell them what a wonderful parent they will be when it does happen for them and wish them all of the luck in the world. That way you can be the person who really gave them comfort at a time when little else does.

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